First half of 2023


This post is long overdue. I have been so busy and stressed out cause summer is so short and so much is to do.

Spring was surprisingly busy. The school has been a lot of work, more than I expected. Autumn is going to be even more crazy. I am a person who likes to take time on tasks. For example, we had to do PowerPoint presentations, one for supporting text and one for independent. It was also okay to use stuff made beforehand, so I sent one I had made supporting my speech earlier. The independent one took two weeks to figure out what it was about and well over a week to execute the plan since I wanted it to be also useable. The same was with other creative assignments. The marketing teacher's response to my first assignment was that she was silenced by how well I had done it. It also worried her that I'm overdoing it.

In marketing, evaluation, like in some other subjects is nothing other than "passed". All this was in April. She was right because I felt burned out in June. Unfortunately that last assignment did not get as much work put into it as the first one, which still bothers me, but I am sure it will pass.

Another overdone assignment was in creative writing. My first time expressing myself in the Finnish language. But also problematically got carried away and ended up writing 24 pages instead of one. Sent it to a couple of friends. The response was good.

One response was this:

"[12:06, 7/23/2023] Her: Triin, you magic maker! 🤗😍🥰 You are so talented!!!

I can't be sorry enough, but it took this long for I finally had the time to read your text thoroughly through. And I wanted to read it thoroughly, not just leaf through it!

[12:07, 7/23/2023] Triin: What? What did I do?👀

[12:07, 7/23/2023] Her: Of course there are things considering writing correctness, but in the end, those are easy-peasy. What is more important is that you have a sense of rhythm in your text, a real beginning, a middle part, and an ending. So you have the basic rules of drama naturally in your guts! What is wonderful is your way to describe those little signs, feelings, hints, and delicate details of things. There's a lot to it that reminds me of my way to observe things 😳, in a way that I could never express in words. All of it may not open up to everyone, but any art doesn't open up to everyone anyway! And it's not even supposed to, because we are all different.

The storyline is believable and easy to relate to. As I've witnessed special encounters in life myself, I sure know things like that can happen! It just popped into my mind that there's something movie-like in it. I think this could be a short story like it is now, and you could write more short stories to accompany it, maybe? But if you want this to be widened up to a longer novel, I'm sure you would make it work as well. If you will show your text to a real publisher, I'm quite sure there would be someone suggesting small changes in the content as well, because that's the way it works. But that's not to take personally. It will still be your text from your unique imagination! Oh, you! 🤗🤗🤗"

Yes, I still speak English with people I met back when I moved to Finland.

But like said it was supposed to be page long assignment, not a short novel. Maybe I find in myself to work on it so much that it would be turned into a real book and published it. If anyone is interested in it, contact me. It is a wough writing in Finnish and with mistakes and for couple of euros you can have a read. It is a fantasy/sense story about a woman spending her holiday on a motorcycle alone from Finland to Norway until she is not alone. Based on fantasy, true, and also fictional events and people. About being alone, accepting yourself, and opening up to what happens in one's mind on a journey to finding peace with oneself. Maybe one day when I have time I could develop it into a romance book or something along those lines. Waiting for the teacher's response right now.

That went off the topic again. Anyways, as said, this grading system gives me low motivation to give my best, to be honest. Now I am starting to understand the "as long as I pass It is okay" performance mantra as I have also felt that I have missed out a lot on my own life during the last months. But I just want to give my best.

Anyway. The school has kept me busy. I have had a chance to ride my bike and now am waiting cause I ordered some toys for him. I didn't even realize how much I had missed riding. Also ordered myself an action camera so hopefully I can share that part with you as well through tik tok even if the riding season here is starting to dim down for me cause my muscles don't stand the cold much. Also, purchased electrical underwear which is still in post in hopes to extend my riding into October. Will see. I have hopes but some dreams are very tender and break too easily. Fingers crossed.

Also, I have to sand down, clean, and make repairs to the roof. Bought paints and all. And have already done preps for about 100m2. But the weather has not been kind, nor having time. It promises one more heatwave I am going to exploit, and hopefully, get the roof painted. 430m2 of joy (read sarcastically). School starts again next week so it is going to be a struggle. I also have two planned custom orders for autumn. I am not taking any more until school is through. Barely have had time for myself. Part of me feels extreme discomfort for not being able to paint or make crafts but the roof needs to be done. Thanks to all of you who made orders last year I have funds for equipment to fix it and also was able to purchase new panels to finish off the outside walls of the house next spring. Everything is ready just missing time and hands to work with. If I would have time It would all be done this autumn but If s and Buts do not fit well into the picture.

On Coming weekend we are going to make a small family trip to south Finland for 2 days. And even though I am excited to spend time with my family and see my dearest friends, godparents of my kids, and my godson with his brother, part of me is anxious cause the weather is good and I could scrub the roof even though my hands have been achy.

So there are things in coming near future that excite me, frustrate me, stress me out, and bring me joy. But it is life, right?

Lots of love to you all! Thank you all for your support! Big hug for everyone and hope you have a lovely autumn! Remember, every day is a gift to appreciate!

© 2023 Triin Jürissaar. All rights reserved.
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